Who: Rafael and Kyky
When: December, 871 ROK
Where: Eastern Woods
Kyky walked dejectedly to the subway. She resented that she was wearing such a dressy-dress: it was uncomfortable, as were the spanx underneath. And for what? The campaign had lost…
What should have been a victory party had instead essentially turned out to be a massive lay-off. Kyky, along with forty-nine other staffers, volunteers, and interns, were all suddenly out of work. It wasn't a surprise, exactly, but Kyky had prioritized this over her schoolwork and that seemed a massive mistake now.
It was eleven at night. As Kyky distractedly scrolled through social media, she was annoyed to find her candidate had made a concession post, congratulating her opponent…
Kyky felt her jaw tighten as she closed out the app. This wasn't just another race to her; it was a step toward common-sense gun laws, and pretending that was just another campaign issue hurt Kyky's soul.
Maybe that was why she noticed the fairy circle. On another night, maybe she would have walked right by and down into the subway tunnel. But, with a cursory glance over her shoulder, Kyky tucked her phone into her pocket, diverted her steps, and soon felt that familiar sensation of falling…
For the last week Rafael had been staking out the tiny eastern village but it wasn't until just last night that he'd managed to spot the vampire. There was only one of them, which explained why the scent had been so very faint, and tonight he'd learned that the female with fiery red hair had taken up residence in the largest of the small cluster of homes. The adults of the village - all five of them - had been taking turns feeding her, while the children had been keeping the small orchard up and running to avoid suspicion.
He'd go in the morning, after the sun had been up long enough for the children to be busy with their work and the humans to be asleep, and sneak into the home. His target was the vampire, but enthralled humans could be dangerous, as well. He'd do his best to keep them alive but not at the expense of his own life . . .
Rafael had just been about to call it a night, to melt back into the forest and retreat to the small den he'd been calling home, when just in front of him a girl appeared. Blonde and lovely, her pale hair and fine dress stood out like a beacon in the darkness and Rafael was moving before he'd even decided on a course of action, quickly and quietly closing the distance between them to come up behind her and clasp a gloved hand over her mouth and pull her into a crouch. "Shhh," he hissed into her ear. "We're not alone."
Kyky's eyes went wide. Before she could even get a sense of where in Eventyr she'd been dropped, she was being grabbed, and a scream of equal parts surprise and fear was muffled by the hand covering her mouth. She quieted quickly, though, hoping that her chances would be better if she didn't make her attacker angry…
Kyky sucked in a steadying breath through her nose, her hand reached up to tug at the arm holding her face, and she tried to turn her head to see who it was. The crouched position was awkward enough that Kyky had to lean against the form behind her to keep any type of balance. He wasn't hurting her - his grip was firm, but not painfully so. What was he talking about? They weren't alone?
Confused, afraid, but at least compliant, Kyky nodded. She made an effort to quiet her panicked breath, and gave the wrist near her jaw a squeeze, a silent promise that she would not scream if he let her go.
Slowly, Rafael's hand eased, as if he expected her to scream the second he let up. His other hand lifted and he pointed over her shoulder to the small cluster of buildings through the trees ahead of them, pale light shining from a few windows but mostly dark.
"Vampire," was all he said in explanation, the word barely more than a breath against the curve of her ear. He eased back just a bit, giving her room to move and pressing his finger against his lips to reiterate: Don't make a sound. He dug two small bits of cotton from a pouch at his waist and handed them to her, gesturing first to his own ears, where a bit of white fluff could just be seen, and then to her own.
Under normal circumstances it would have been both stupid and dangerous to deny oneself a perfectly functioning sense while in the forest in the middle of the night, but this close to a vampire's lair meant the rules were different. Denying his sense of hearing could be the only thing to save his life should the vampire happen to realize he was there.
Tipping his head, Rafael signaled for the girl to follow him, backing away slowly and quietly and keeping a weather eye for any sign of movement around them.
Vampire? Kyky pulled back enough to see the man's face, and her lips made an "O" of recognition. He wasn't a creeper, he was a hunter. That was why his attack hadn't felt aggressive. She accepted the cotton with a mouthed "thank you" as she pressed the fluff into her ears. She knew very well how enticing a vampire's voice was; too well, in fact. It actually took a measure of willpower to stuff her ears at all - god, a vampire's thrall was good.
Once she was free, Kyky followed the man deeper into the forest. It was disconcerting that she could not hear anything, and she stumbled more than she should have. This dress was excessive - Kyky tried to tuck some of the fabric up into her belt. Why hadn't Eventyrian ladies come around to pants yet?
Kyky stopped only briefly, when her eye caught the shape of a prime piece of wood on the ground. It wasn't straight, exactly, but it was as long as she was tall, and Kyky scooped it up, hefted it over a shoulder, and continued.
Rafael bit back a sigh as he led the way through the trees, glancing over his shoulder the third time the girl tripped over her dress. He had no idea who she was or where the fairy circle had spit her out from but it was obvious by that dress that she hadn't exactly planned on trekking through the forests here at the edge of the Borderlands and the Near-Woods. This also meant that he felt a certain amount of responsibility for her safety - and also if he had her, then it meant the vampire wouldn't grab her and add yet another innocent human to his potential list of kills.
Once they were far enough from the village, Rafael pulled the cotton from his ears and gestured for her to do the same, letting in the faint rush of a waterfall. It was closer than it sounded due to the press of trees around them, and was growing louder with every step they took.
Within minutes, they came upon the river then and, to the right, a waterfall about twelve feet high. Rafael walked toward it, picking his way along the bank with sure steps before disappearing behind the curtain of water.
Behind was a small cave, plenty big enough for one but a bit cramped for two. His things were off to the side - weapons and a pack and a bedroll spread out on the ground - and there was the remnants of a small campfire, the ashes cold but kindling and firewood stacked at the back of the cave.
"It's not safe for you here alone," he said, unbuckling his sword from his waist and setting it aside with the other weapons. "Not with that thing in the area."
Kyky followed along closely, plucking the cotton from her ears when he signaled. This was the East, she guessed first because of the forest, but maybe more like the North-East, given the rocky waterfall. She had never been in this area before, so Kyky wondered: why had the fairy circle brought her here?
Her jacket had transformed into a fur shawl, and Kyky pulled it up over her hair to protect it from the water splashing off the rocks as she followed her companion into the small cave. It was a smart spot - he was a professional.
"Yeah, seriously, thanks," Kyky said with a nod and a childish puff of a sigh. When he removed his sword, Kyky held out a hand and asked, "May I? If I have to run from a vampire, I'm not going to make it in this skirt." She knelt down to make the rough alteration, slicing through the fine fabric to take off six inches or so, just enough to free up her feet. "Does it have a captive, or is it hunting?"
Rafael handed over his sword, not worried about her turning it on him; she'd shown trust by even following him and the least he could do is return that kindness. While she worked to make her dress a bit more wilderness friendly, he grabbed a handful of kindling and began getting a fire going and then raised an impressed eyebrow at her question.
Vampires were hardly unknown across the realm but the average citizen rarely knew more than the basics. Either she'd read some books - possibly even his father's - or she had experience and he wasn't sure which he preferred.
"Five of them," he answered, blowing gently on the spark until the kindling caught. "Every adult who was working the orchard." He placed a log on the fire, then sat down and pulled his bag closer. Just inside was his pelt, folded neatly, and he dug down next to it to find the wrapped loaf of bread and cheese. "How much do you know about vampires?" he asked curiously, using a dagger to carve off a chunk of cheese and then held it out in silent offer.
"More than I should," Kyky answered, as she set the sword neatly with the other weapons and settled down on the other side of the fire. She tipped her chin up and brushed her fingers over the scars on her throat, one side and then the other. She was lucky they weren't worse - Bert had guessed that the vampire who'd held her had been one for at least a decade - because so many people were paranoid about creatures that sometimes just being touched by one was enough to get you ostracized. "Enough to know that five captives means bad news. They're going to fight, and at least four of them will be awake during the day..."
The fire slowly coming to life allowed Kyky to finally get a good look at her companion. He was a little older than she was, strong, handsome, well-prepared. She hadn't ever met someone hunting creatures on their own - it was such a dangerous job that everyone she knew worked in groups. Maybe that's why the fairy circle dropped her here; maybe he needed help. Kyky leaned forward to accept the cheese with a grateful smile. "I'm Kyky."
Rafael's expression didn't change as she pointed out the scars on her throat, easily missed in the dark and with pale locks framing them, but it did leave him with a wary sort of feeling in his gut. Not that he'd hold it against her, having been fed on by a vampire - it wasn't something most people chose, after all - but it did make him wonder if she was enough of a liability that he should be seeking out the nearest fairy circle to send her through rather than hosting her for the night.
"Leonardo," he answered, giving her the alias he'd adopted for the sake of hunting. With the way she was dressed, he wouldn't be surprised if she was a noble of some sort and he didn't want to risk her recognizing his name.
He tore off a chunk of bread and then set the loaf close enough that she could help herself if she wished. "Thank you for the advice, Kyky," he said, amused that she seemed to be just as worried about him as he was about her. "But, I'll be fine."
His head tipped slightly as he regarded her, absently scuffing a foot over the dirt floor of the cave to erase an errant paw print. "So why would a fairy circle bring you this close to a vampire?" he asked, directly.
"No idea!" Kyky declared, with a wide, cheerful smile that befitted a child at a birthday party more than someone facing the possibility of a deadly creature. There was something very empowering about being in Eventyr - perhaps it was the fresh new body, or the smaller population: here, you could feel like what you did mattered. At home, a new gun law may or may not save a handful of kids Kyky would never know. Here, she could see these give farmers' faces. "Maaaaybe because I have an axe to grind with vampires." That was an appropriate turn of phrase, she thought, and was proud of herself.
"I did not set an intention for my travel," Kyky said, using a term she heard from yoga all the time because she didn't hear people discussing fairy circles very much. But it was the same sort of thing, she supposed. You went where you wanted to go. "But -- I usually turn up where someone needs help." She took a bite of the cheese and took a portion of bread as well. She watched her new friend, and detected a bit of… skepticism? Dismissiveness? Which was fair, to be sure, but she tilted her head.
At her words, Rafael's brow did, indeed, furrow with skepticism. Who just hopped into a fairy circle without a destination in mind? It seemed stupid and reckless and more than a little dangerous, especially considering she came without any sort of supplies. What if she'd been dropped into the middle of a sandstorm in the South? Or the tundra in the North? Or in the middle of a battle? A warlord's camp? As it was, she'd been dropped on a vampire's doorstep.
"You take me for a damsel, Leo, don't'cha?" Kyky assessed, with a shake of her head, and going ahead to assume enough familiarity to shorten up the name he'd given her. Only hoity-toity nobles cared about those long names, didn't they? And certainly none of them mutilated their fine dresses, so she was glad to embrace the tossing away of that norm. "I'm not. And I suspect that if you were actually 'going to be fine'.... the fairy circle wouldn't've dropped me here."
"Not a damsel," he answered with a shake of his head. But profoundly stupid, maybe. "But I'm hardly the person here who needs help." She was lucky she'd run into him, otherwise she'd likely have a set of fangs in her neck right this moment. And he still wasn't completely convinced that hadn't been her intention, even subconsciously.
Slicing free another chunk of hard cheese, Rafael popped it into his mouth and then set the wedge aside with the bread. "I mean no offense, Kyky, but you'll be on your way come sunrise." He reached for his sword, intending to sharpen it, but as he did, he felt his sleeve catch on a scab, pulling it free from the underside of his wrist. Fuck. He changed course, instead grabbing his bag and digging a clean cloth out and, as he did, he used his teeth to pull his leather glove off.
"I work better alone," he added, a touch of annoyance in his voice as he stuffed the cloth up his sleeve to soak up the blood.
Kyky wasn't stupid - well, maybe that was up for debate, as many a friend might have called her a ditz - but it wasn't hard to follow the line of his skepticism. He must have assumed she was one of those vampire devotees; Kyky had heard they were popping up now all over the West. And the truth was that she totally understood them; it was like drugs, but for people who believed an overdose was just going to give them eternal life and super strength, which was not exactly a hard sell. Kyky didn't see it that way. She had felt such deep love for a man she had never actually knew, to a man who saw her as nothing more than food, so she knew it was all fake and she had no desire to go back there. Or let anyone else.
Kyky hardly missed a beat, chipper as ever. "Well then, maybe I came to help those five enthralled humans." She clearly hadn't taken offense, but hadn't conceded that she would leave in the morning, either. "Someone rescued me, after all. He's a Sheriff now, in the West..." She trailed off and tilted her head a bit as she caught the sight of blood in the dim light and her face crinkled in concern. "Oh no - did it get you?" Vampires usually went for necks - for blood flow and intimacy - but they would take a wrist in a pinch...
Rafael lifted his eyes, focusing on the woman sitting across the fire from him. There was a lot of information there in her words, so casually thrown out, and while he silently admitted that maybe she had a point about helping the vampire's thralls, he was also curious about this Sheriff from the West who'd saved her. Was it someone he knew?
Either way, her positivity was both annoying and refreshing and Rafael found himself wondering if maybe she could be some sort of help. Bait, maybe? The thought had a breath of amusement sneaking out, even though he'd never actually do that.
"No," he answered, turning his attention back to the wound on his wrist. It was from his own tooth, sharp and canine, and inflicted just this morning when he'd shed his pelt. He'd gotten quite good at locating the seams amongst his fur, but catching those first few threads was challenging and the first couple of days afterwards were always a mess of torn scabs and itchy, healing, wounds.
"If I'd tangled with the vampire, it would be dead and I'd already be on my way." He pushed his sleeve up just enough to wrap the bandage around his wrist and begin clumsily tying it in place one-handed. "Can you even fight?" he asked without looking up.
"Technically, it's already dead, so," Kyky said, and pursed her lips together in an obvious attempt not to laugh at her own joke as she watched to see if a little creature-humor could break through her companion's stony exterior. He looked like he needed a laugh.
Rafael's glance was accompanied by a twist of lips and a hint of mirth in his dark eyes as he rolled them. She wasn't wrong but the joke wasn't that funny either - not enough to warrant that pleased-with-herself expression on her face anyway . . .
"Here, let me help," Kyky said, scooting carefully around the fire and extending her hands in offer. When he seemed reluctant, she gave him the same face a mother might give an obstinate child as she added the most logical argument she could. "Shoddy bandaging means more blood. Blood makes us a beacon for the vampire. Let me help." First aid, Kyky was great at, and it showed in the way she first applied pressure to the wound with both thumbs. It always uncomfortably reminded her of the way her friend had leaned both palms on her gunshot wounds, putting all her weight into it, and how Kyky had tried not to scream at the pain, knowing the shooter could come back any moment... But afterward, she had taken First Aid/CPR classes - it was a way of taking back some control.
"Yes, my sheriff friend taught me," Kyky said, and readily supplied his name. She wondered if he was famous yet. "Bertie… Bertie…. Bertilak." Tying the bandage carefully, she searched for his last name. "Bertilak Weston. You know, I love that about Eventyr. Everything seems to be called what it is. Lake City, it's a city on a lake. The city where the King lives, King's City. He's from the West, he's Weston…" Kyky shrugged and laughed, and realized she'd gotten off topic, and circled back to answer the question. "I can fight. I don't kill, but I'll have your back while you do." There was a certain hopeful expectation in her words, an unasked question, if he would have her…
Rafael watched her with a wary eye as she took over bandaging the wound on his wrist. It wasn't bad, not really, maybe an inch long and two or so inches from the heel of his hand and it could have come from any sort of accident, but it was the possibility of her spotting the other scars that had his heart beating just a hint faster. If she noticed them though, she didn't say a word.
Bertilak Weston? Rafael knew the name and the family, though if he remembered correctly, Bertilak was a bit older than he was, closer to Miguel and Mariana's age, and he'd been a bit . . . awkward the few times the families had interacted - not that Rafael was one to talk now. Still, he'd heard enough about the Sheriff and his combat prowess to be somewhat impressed that Kyky had learned from him and as she prattled on about this and that, he found himself wondering if he'd underestimated her. Maybe there was more to her than pretty blue eyes and cornsilk hair. Maybe she'd even be--
"Don't kill?" he repeated, giving her a dubious look as he took his hand back and pulled his glove on. He knew exactly where this was going. "If you're not willing to kill than you're definitely no use to me," he added, not missing the implication of her words. "Though I appreciate your . . . zeal."
"Oh yeah?" Kyky said, twisting her long hair it into a loose ponytail over her shoulder as she joked in a mocking, almost cartoonish voice, "Nevermind, then! I'm Jane McMurderPants…"
There was a subtle shift in her body language - a slight turn of her torso back toward the fire, the way she drew her knees up closer to her chest, a glance toward the door. It might have been nothing but getting a little more comfortable on the cold floor, but it accompanied discomfort with the idea. She had gone through so much anger, at her shooter who had wounded her and killed her classmates and then gone to Walmart and bought a soda. At fucking Laura Ingraham, at the Florida legislature that voted down a gun safety bill while she and her traumatized senior class waited in the wings…. Kyky had wanted to kill. In the end, she'd understood her shooter's anger better than she expected she would.
"I don't think we need a vampire or a zombie bite to make us monsters," Kyky said, some of the cheer gone from her voice, replaced instead with a sort of practical resignation. "Humans can be just as bad or worse on their own. Everyone's got to find their own paths, and that one is just not one I'm willing to walk."
Even if her words were nonsense to his ears, Rafael understood the sarcasm just fine and his own snarky retort was all ready to be fired back at her, but he hesitated. There was something in her body language that struck a familiar chord within him but it was her words that had understanding dawn.
She'd been victimized and not just by the vampire who'd enthralled her; someone human had hurt her. Immediately, his brain led to the assumption that her trauma was akin to his, though he hadn't even the slightest bit of proof that could be the case. This silent revelation left him conflicted, partly wanting to tell her that he understood while simultaneously wanting to preserve the walls he'd constructed.
I wish I had another patient like you, Rafael, Scholar Abraham had told him. Because I think connecting with someone who had been through something similar would be good for you.
"Creatures are dangerous because it's in their nature," Rafael said, eyes going to the fire to watch the flames dance into the air because it was easier than looking at her. "They don't know any better and they can't control it." He swallowed, "Humans choose to be cruel. They choose to be monsters." But killing to survive didn't make someone a monster any more than hunting to eat did. Sometimes it was necessary. Still, he could understand and respect not wanting to become the thing that had hurt you.
Kyky nodded, her gaze also settling comfortably on the fire. She noticed the softening of his tone, the way his words seemed to meet hers on the same level. He had been keeping her at arm's length until now, and it made conversation easier.
"And it's not fair because they're, like, more effective. Pain, and hatred, and fear spread faster and last longer than a zombie plague. Even if we tried, we couldn't spread joy or love that fast, and even if we could, it would be gone as soon as another threat showed up…" Which was why Kyky preferred to spend her days fighting against suffering instead of for happiness, to make the world a better place. She could have tried to be a musician or comedian or healer, but there was more value, she thought, in preventing or at least mitigating the pain in the first place.
"My therapist calls it negativity bias," Kyky said, complete with air quotes, before she realized that she didn't think therapists were a thing in Eventyr. But she tended to find that Eventyrians ignored references they didn't understand. Just a moment ago, Leonardo had skipped over her McMurderPants joke. So, she just went on, explaining, "It's impossible to feel happy until you feel safe. Which is good to know, and all," therapists could be overeducated sometimes, she thought with a ghost of a smirk, "but isn't exactly all that useful."
For a moment, silence settled between them as Rafael digested her words and realized that they made sense. He hadn't truly felt happiness until he'd stitched the wolf pelt to his human skin and part of that was because of how very safe it made him feel. When he was on four legs, armed with teeth and claws and superior senses, he felt like nothing could - or would dare to - touch him. And he was happy . . .
"I think that's true," he admitted, finally pulling his eyes from the fire to look at her instead. "What your . . . therapist? says, I mean." He paused, as if trying to decide whether or not to continue, then the words were coming anyway. "Someone told me once that not all wounds were to the body, that some affected who you were on the inside and changed the person you were. He told me that healing those inside wounds came from facing what hurt you in the first place. That you had to acknowledge it, otherwise it would just continued to injure you, over and over again." But it was hard to acknowledge something that caused so much pain to begin with and sometimes it was easier to just keep stitching it back up inside you.
Kyky shrugged and nodded, looking at her hands as if in illustration. "You get a splinter in your finger, you can pull it out, wash it, move on. But, you get an arrow, you can't just pull it out and move on. Someone put it there, and that's a thousand percent worse…"
Kyky laughed, a sound that was cathartic more than humorous. "You have a therapist too, huh?" Just friends or family did not give such thoughtful, constructive advice. "Your brain wants to do literally anything else…" Like escape away to another world? Maybe it wasn't exactly another world, though, Kyky thought, raising her eyes up toward her companion. "But even if you face it, then what? And you see clear as day, that you're powerless against cruelty far and beyond what you ever dreamed. And you're not sure how much your life mattered in the long run…" Seventeen kids had died, and she could have been number eighteen, and what difference would that have made?
"I don't know, I think it's always going to hurt you. Maybe less, over time, but... " Kyky said, and for the first time, really let herself wonder what Leo here had gone through. It must have been something like herself, because he didn't sound like the type to try to comfort a random girl, spouting vague nonsense. His thoughts met her own, step by step. She understood every word and every tone, and she wished she had something more hopeful to offer in return, but she wasn't a therapist. She was one of thousands of gutshot victims, actively avoiding the world that had hurt her and then continued to fail her in the most extreme way possible. "So, I figure, we've just gotta figure out how to heal ourselves. Inside out. Over and over. Forever, probably."
Is that what he was doing? Healing himself over and over again by injuring his body? Absently, Rafael's hand went to his chest, where under the layers of fabric and leather lay the physical manifestation of his hurt, even more so than the scars left from his actual assailants. Every stitch brought with it a tiny release, pleasurable in a way that was different, but no less addictive, than sex. But maybe it didn't matter. That was certainly the takeaway he got from Kyky's words, anyway. Do what worked; whatever helped you get through each day.
Chewing his lip in thought, Rafael poked at the fire with the toe of his boot, pushing the unburnt end of a log into the glowing coals, then he asked something that he probably shouldn't have: "What do you do to heal yourself?"
It was a question that he wasn't even sure why he asked. In fact, had it been turned on him, he'd likely have hit the roof, but he'd never met anyone who was so willing to speak candidly about this sort of thing and maybe it was an opportunity that he simply couldn't pass up. And it was this thought that kept him from apologizing, from absolving her of any need to answer before she even decided whether she wanted to or not . . .
Kyky paused before answering. She had tried so many things. Therapy hadn't helped enough, nor medication. A vampire's fangs hadn't helped, either. Pot was nice, but hardly a solution.
"I wish I knew," Kyky said, honestly. A few minutes ago, she had felt like she was holding her ground, selling herself as a competent sidekick. But she did not really have an answer… nor any desire to lie. "All I know is that I want to make the world a little better, every day. It seems that's different, each time...?" Giving a sandwich to a homeless man certainly didn't have the payoff as saving five enthralled humans from becoming vampires. Some days were more satisfying than others.
Kyky laughed, again humorlessly, and shrugged. Her hand ran through her hair, fingernails against her scalp. "Mostly, I wander through fairy circles and hope for the best. I find good people, and I support them. I fight, but I don't kill. I don't know, for sure, what I'm looking for - but I know I'm looking for something." A sad smile tugged at her lips. "I hope I'll know it when I find it."
Rafael stayed quiet as she talked, listening and absorbing, reading between the spoken lines and finding that he related to a lot of what she said. Didn't he spend the majority of his time wandering from place to place, staying just long enough to shift to his fae hound form, find a target and dispatch them? He wasn't sure what - if anything - he was searching for either and, probably, he didn't stay in one place long enough to find it. The good people he met were avoided before any meaningful connections could be made and the bad . . . well, that just depended on the situation.
"You do this," he said, gesturing around the small cave as the dots connected inside his head. "You go through a fairy circle, without any destination in mind, without any thought of what could be waiting for you." His voice grew just a touch louder, something that could almost be described as passion creeping into his tone; they were the same. "That's dangerous but you still do it anyway. Whatever you find brings temporary peace." This was just Kyky's version of stitching a wolf hide to her skin. She got it, even if she didn't realize it.
Biting his lip, it took Rafael approximately four seconds to make what was potentially a stupid decision. He turned to face her and began unlacing the leather bracer from his wrist, pulling it off and pushing his sleeve up to bear the entire underside of his forearm and the scars traveling up the center. Some, like the one she'd bandaged earlier, were raw and fresh but others healed long enough to be white against the copper gold of his skin. And others, still, somewhere in between. "This is how I do it." Then he reached up and pulled the knotted collar away from his throat, "See?" He touched fingertips to the scars that started just below the hollow of his throat, continuing down a few more inches to disappear into his shirt.
TBC